Which hotels do travel writers check into when they go on holidays? That's what Mark Hudson, a writer himself for The Sunday Times, among other publications, was keen to know, so he asked 50 of them (including myself) and published their recommendations, 'Where travel writers pay to stay', on his site 101 Holidays. I've been meaning to share this one with you for a while. If you're a regular Cool Travel Guide reader, you'll know (from this post and others) that I've been increasingly frustrated with user-generated content of the kind you get on Trip Advisor, and find myself looking more and more for recommendations by experts, so I was pleased to see Mark do this. Ah, but you say, aren't all hotel reviews in magazines and papers written by experts? Well, yes they are, but they aren't always the kind of hotels that the experts actually stay at when they have a choice. Sometimes hotels are reviewed because they're 'hot properties', newly opened, relaunched, or because an advertiser/business partner has asked for them to be reviewed. Pictured above is a detail from the sitting room at the Novecento, a hotel we stayed for pleasure, not work, when we attended the Venice Biennale in June - it's not new and not 'hot', but it has loads of charm, is in a wonderful location, and the staff are some of the best around.

A recent hotel stay reminded us of just how bad they can occasionally be. We checked into a respectable five star city hotel in the early evening, did some work, then went out to dinner and checked out a bar afterwards. We'd had a really exhausting day - morning shoot, long drive, flat tyre, an important appointment we almost missed. You get the picture. We rocked in from dinner around midnight, got changed, and dragged ourselves to bed, only to find the bed - the sheets, the edge of the pillows and the doona (quilt, eiderdown), well, um... damp. I took a sniff. It smelt okay, like water. No air-conditioning above the bed. Perhaps the laundromat hadn't properly dried it and it then dampened everything else? I called the front desk and explained. Half an hour later a housekeeper showed up without fresh linen. We explained again. He disappeared. He returned another 20 minutes later with fresh sheets, but no doona, no mattress protector. Bring a friend, I called out, as he disappeared, as you'll probably have to turn the mattress over too. He returned another 15 minutes later with a colleague, mattress protector, and doona. However, when they pulled off the mattress protector to turn the mattress over, we saw an enormous yellow circle. Yes! Urine! Why on earth a maid had remade a urine-soaked bed in a five star hotel that clearly wasn't full was beyond me. By 1.30am, the Night Manager had moved us. Did I ever tell you about the bed bugs story? So, what was your worst hotel experience? 

Pictured? Definitely not the hotel in question - that's one of our better hotel experiences.

I thought the day would never come so I was over the moon to learn that at last a hotel is offering a full 24 hour stay. You can check in anytime you want - yes, that's right - A-N-Y-T-I-M-E - and check out again a whole 24 hours later! At long last guests will actually get what they pay for, instead of the 20 hours they're typically allowed to stay if they check in at 2pm and check out by 10am, which seems to be the norm these days. So three cheers for The Address, and it's sister-property The Palace, in Dubai, two properties that are part of the new Emaar hotel group. You may recall that this was something Terry and I complained about in the 10 things that annoy us about hotels series, and it's something that has really irked us, especially as we spend around 300 days a year in hotels. So we're looking forward to testing out the service when we're back in Dubai, just to make sure there's no catch. We'll let you know how our 24 hour stay goes. Let's hope this innovation catches on. Pictured? That's the sublime spa suite at The Address.

Damascus boasts some of the Middle East's most beautiful boutique hotels, which I've written about before on Cool Travel Guide. Mostly they're enchanting old courtyard houses in the labyrinthine Old Town that have been exquisitely renovated with pretty fountains, cushioned sofas and the all-pervading scent of jasmine dripping from their walls. But Ghiath Machnock's Art House is something very different indeed. For one, it's set in a splendid old mill, which the architect spent years restoring, it has a stunning rooftop pool and terrace cafe, another atmospheric cafe-cum breakfast room inside, and rooms themed by Middle East artists and furnished with antique Syrian art deco furniture. Secondly, it's as much a cultural centre and art gallery as it is a hotel, with regular exhibitions of art, music recitals and cultural festivals; an opening night at one of these is not to be missed! Thirdly, it's not in the Old Town, it's on a hill overlooking Damascus, on the edge of the modern part of town. It's an area that few tourists get to, but one that's ideally located for the city's arty types and music students, for whom Ghiath has an open door policy. It's also handy for Beirut's creative set heading into town for the weekend - Lebanese pop musicians have been known to transfer their music studio here for a week's recording, so it's become a bit of an artist's retreat. In the year or so since it opened Art House has very quickly become a vital part of the city's cultural scene. You can read more about it here in Art of the Matter, a story we wrote for Jazeera Airline's funky in-flight magazine.

So, what are some of the other things travel writers are looking for when we're judging a hotel? If you've just joined me, read part 1 here.
* The bathroom: is it clean and spacious with lots of light? Is there a rain shower or shower with good water pressure? Does the shower stay up and not fall down and hit you on the head? Does the water get really hot? Does the shower not flood the bathroom? Can you sit on the toilet without having to tuck your needs under the sink? Are there big fluffy towels and hand towels? High quality toiletries? A high-speed hairdryer?
* The hotel: whether it's a luxury property or budget hotel, does it have character, personality and atmosphere? Does it have a sense of style? And what about attention to detail? Are there signs in the lift and is the signage discrete? Are there fresh flowers? A bowl (not a vase) of fruit? Newspapers and magazines, or even better a lounge with library? Wi-fi in the public spaces? If it's a luxury property, there should be a decent-sized swimming pool with lots of sun beds. There should be a good cafe with staff who know their coffees, and a buzzy bar with a bartender who knows how to mix a cocktail (our usual test is whether he can make a martini). There should be a fine quality restaurant where locals like to eat. Breakfast should be freshly made, no cereal in packets and no cold scrambled eggs - if it's a budget place, keep it simple and just give us espresso coffee and fresh hot pastries, if it's a luxury hotel then we still expect espresso coffee (no percolated 'American coffee' in a pot), a hot cooked breakfast as well as local breakfast options on the menu.
* The staff: Do they smile? Are they welcoming, warm and friendly? Do they ask how you are? Do they offer to help with your luggage and shopping? And do they back off when you don't need assistance? Are they intuitive, attentive, accommodating, and have a 'can do', 'anything, anywhere, anytime' attitude? Does the concierge know the town like nobody else and can organize anything for you? Do they break the rules and go beyond the call of duty if they have to? As Mr and Mrs Smith asked in a recent post on what makes a boutique hotel: would they fix me a bite to eat if I arrived after hours? (Disappointingly, we recently found that one much-written-about five star luxury hotel on the Italian Riviera wouldn't!)
* Check-out: Is it fast and efficient? Do they manage to print up a correct bill without too much fuss? Do they ask you how your stay was? Do they seem like they actually cared? Is a taxi waiting or is the car ready with your luggage already in it? Is their goodbye as warm as their welcome so you leave thinking this is a hotel you could happily head back to?
So, have I left anything out? What do you expect from a hotel? And what factors are important to you when you size up a hotel?

As travel writers, we don't wait for the site inspection to start ticking the check boxes. We begin judging a hotel from the moment we arrive. If we're pulling up in a car loaded with luggage and camera gear, we don't want to have to search for someone to help with our bags and find out where the parking is. We want the reception staff to welcome us. We want check-in to go quickly and smoothly and not have to wait around for 15 minutes, and later, when we come down to ask for dining tips (one of our tests) we want the staff to pick up the phone and book us a table (which is exactly what happened at the excellent Golden Palace Hotel in Turin recently.) So what other criteria do we use to select hotels for the guidebooks and stories we write?
* Arrival: if it's a four or five star, does the porter take care of our bags quickly and carefully without a hassle, if there's a valet does he park our car, or if not, does someone point us to the garage without fuss; and if it's a budget or mid-range hotel, are we greeted and given instructions promptly?
* First impressions: if it's a boutique place, is it stylish and chic? If it's a design hotel, does it have that wow factor? If it's a beach or spa resort, is the setting sublime and do we immediately feel soothed and relaxed? If it's a luxury hotel, is there a welcome drink, fresh flowers, comfortable sofas? Is the lobby somewhere where you wish you had time to sit? No matter the level of hotel, is it welcoming? Is there atmosphere? Is there low music? Is this a place you're happy to have arrived at, and already you're wishing you were staying longer?
* Check-in: is the welcome warm, as if you've arrived home? Are you checked-in efficiently and with a smile? Is it hassle-free? Do staff explain when and where breakfast is, what time check-out is, where the key facilities are, and point you to the elevator? If there's someone to show you to your room, do they do it speedily? If not, are you given directions so you're not wandering the corridors impatiently?
* The room: is this a room you can enter and immediately wish your own was like this? Is it easy to open the door, turn on the lights, control the AC? Is it clean, quiet, spacious, private, and comfortable? Is there lots of light? A door or window that opens to let in fresh air? Is there a balcony and a view? Is it a room you can relax in? Is the bed so comfortable you never want to get out of it? Do the sheets have a high thread count? Are there lots of pillows? Is the layout well designed, i.e. you're not tripping over things, bumping into furniture, you can find somewhere to open your bag and still get around the bed? Are the amenities well thought-out and do the facilities fit the price range? For a five star we're looking for everything from a fully-stocked mini bar with enticing stuff to eat and drink to an espresso machine, kettle and box of delicious teas? Is there an ironing board and iron and a large safe that holds two laptops? Is there wi-fi that works? Is there information on the hotel and destination? A good 24 hour room service menu? Local magazines to read? Complimentary bottles of water? A bottle of local wine and real wine glasses? Are there slippers or flip flops in the cupboard?
Read part 2 here.

How travel writers decide upon which hotels they are going to include in a guidebook or story is a topic that received some media attention earlier this year after Lonely Planet writer Thomas Kohnstamm revealed in his tell-all book how he'd favorably reviewed a place after having sex with the waitress on a table. How the staff perform - on the job, not after hours - is certainly something that comes into the equation when we're considering hotels for potential inclusion in our books or articles. But a whole host of other factors are also up for scrutiny. Mr and Mrs Smith shared on their blog recently the qualities that define a good boutique hotel for them in What makes a Smith hotel? The 'wow' factor is high on their list, but also other elements, from a sensational setting and imaginative interiors to remarkable views and a 'nothing is too much trouble' attitude. While these attributes appear on the long list of criteria we tick off, the criteria we use varies depending on the project and readers. It can even vary within the same project. For instance, when we write for Thomas Cook or AA, we know their readers are mature travellers (30 years upwards) who don't want to waste money but are happy to spend up on special properties that will provide them with memorable experiences, whether it's a beach resort or luxury B&B. Lonely Planet and Rough Guides, for instance, have a much wider readership: all ages, all budgets. Lonely Planet's accommodation is structured by economics: budget, mid-range and top-end. And while there are always going to be certain constants we'll consider across all price ranges, for example, whether rooms are clean, there are things that only apply to a particular category, and the list will inevitably be shorter the lower the budget. After all, we shouldn't have many expectations of a place that only charges $20 a night. On the other hand, if the rate is $300 a night then our list is going to be long. We're going to spend more time looking at the property, and we're going to be scrutinizing it a whole lot more closely. That's not to say we don't run our fingers over the furniture at all properties. We do. We also look for mould in the bathroom, scuffs on the carpets, peeling wallpaper, cigarette burns on the furniture, and, yes, we'll have a bounce on the mattress. But the four and five star properties will be the ones we'll check in to. A lot of travel writers will do it the other way around - they'll sleep at the budget hotel and do site inspections of the top end places. But the way we see it is if a backpacker has a lousy experience at a hostel they may only be blowing $30. If a traveller has a dreadful time at a luxury property, they might have wasted a whole week's pay, especially if they're stayed a few days. Although it's important to get it right for all hotels, it's far more crucial at the top end than it is at the lower end. Therefore, it's more important that we experience the boutique and luxury properties than it is for us to stay at a youth hostel. And let's face it, you get to a certain age when you can no longer share a dorm with strangers and you simply prefer to travel with certain comforts. We didn't become writers to travel like teenagers. Nor to copulate on restaurant tables either.

The photo? One resort where you're guaranteed a very special experience: the Six Senses Hideaway Hua Hin at Pranburi, Thailand. We stayed in the private pool bungalow, pictured, last October while researching spas, hotels and restaurants for the DK Eyewitness Thailand guide.

Hotel gurus Mr and Mrs Smith recently shared their secrets as to How Smith finds hotels on their engaging blog. Mrs Smith is a Cool Travel Guide reader and after she recently commented on my post Don't judge a guidebook by its cover: judge it by its author, I asked her how she selects hotels. Mr and Mrs Smith use a combination of sources: their staff, members, hoteliers, press releases, the media, Smith spies, and hotel books. Travel writers draw on a similar set of resources, dividing We our hotel research into pre-trip and on-the-road research:
* PRE-TRIP RESEARCH
1) Travel guidebooks & websites - if we're updating a guidebook, we'll start by looking at the hotels in the book, to see what's in there and what's missing. Then we skim through other guides on the destination. Because publishers like Lonely Planet, DK, Fodors and Frommers have put so much content online, we don't even need to visit a bookshop. What are we looking for? Overlap first of all. If a hotel appears in every guidebook then it had better be special or it had better be the only one in town. If it doesn't appear anywhere else, then we need to find out why. We make notes on these things which we'll investigate later in person.
2) The Internet - we'll look at the websites of hotels on our list and make notes as to which look suitable, suspect, or so fabulous we have to investigate further. We'll check hotel booking sites like Design Hotels, i-escape, Tablet, Hip Hotels, Holiday Pad , Small Luxury Hotels of the World, Leading Hotels of the World, and of course, Mr and Mrs Smith, to see if there are any new hotels that could be worth considering. We'll also do some random Googling. Occasionally we'll check Trip Advisor; there, we're not looking for new properties (as we're more interested in reviews by professional travel critics, people who spend more nights in hotels than they do at home) but rather to confirm any suspicions we might have about a place.
3) Hotel GMs & PRs - because we've stayed at, inspected, reviewed, and photographed tens of thousands of hotels around the globe, we have a lot of friends who manage and work at hotels, so we hear about new hotel openings over conversation, whether it's by email or at dinner, drinks or parties.
4) PRs & press releases - ditto; we have contacts who work on staff at hotels as Public Relations, Media Relations or MarkComm managers, or for PR agencies representing hotels, so we're on a lot of mailing lists and feeds. Dozens of emails arrive in our In Box every day about hotel openings (including invitations to launches!) See Terry's photos of the behind-the-scenes preparations and glam opening of the InterContinental Dubai Festival City earlier this year here.)
5) Travel media - we read every travel magazine and newspaper travel section there is, as many in-flight and hotel mags we can get our hands on, and frequently scour their websites. We subscribe to all the industry and trade feeds and online newsletters. I don't tend to look at travel websites or blogs like Hotel Chatter for new hotels, because generally they've received the same press releases I have, and I'd rather read the information straight from the source than someone else's interpretation. While I occasionally rip items out of travel magazines, due to their long lead times we tend to know about the hotel, and have probably already stayed there, by the time the issue hits the newsstands but their still handy for some we may have missed.
* ON-THE-ROAD RESEARCH
6) Hotel experiences - once we're on the road in a destination, we'll be testing out hotels by staying, eating and drinking at them (both undercover and through arrangement), and by doing hotel inspections. We'll also hear about new hotels this way. While the hotel PR is showing us a suite, she'll probably say "Oh, have you seen the suites at the new xxx hotel? I hear they're lovely but not as spacious as ours."
7) Leg-work - once we arrive at a destination, we'll have a lot of places to check out and try, restaurants, cafes, bars, clubs, shops, museums, galleries, and other attractions, and during encounters with people at these places, we'll inevitably hear about hotel openings.
8) Accidental discoveries - as we pound the pavements of a city all day every day, there'll always be one or two hotels we stumble upon that we haven't read heard about and nobody has mentioned. They may have just opened or may still be under construction, or maybe it's a hidden gem that's been continually over-looked or recently renovated. Either way, we'll be in there checking it out.

So, how do you hear about hotels? And have you ever discovered secret gems that weren't in any guidebooks or websites that nobody seemed to know about? Pictured: our studio apartment at the sublime Aleenta Phuket, which we experienced last October while we were in Thailand for DK.

We hope you enjoyed our series '10 things that annoy us about hotels'. If you missed it, you can read all 10 posts here. A big thank you to the hoteliers who responded to our gripes with some explanation as to why hotels do the things they do, and in some cases, how their hotels do things differently. They were very enlightening. Do take a read of the comments too, which have been appreciated. We're relieved to know it's not just us who are driven crazy by this stuff. I've also received some comments by email, including one from Guido, the Happy Hotelier, which was hilarious: "Plastic under sheets. As if we are babies without diapers. Its the first thing we check after we check into a hotel and we take them off and replace them with towels......usually many towels because in many hotels the towels are like handkerchiefs." Travel writer David Whitley stays in as many hotels as we do and he had some really insightful comments. David wrote a superb piece on his 'Top 10 hotel bugbears' for Ninemsn Travel. David's gripes include: twin beds passed off as a double, key cards, keycard light slots, 1001 lights, environmental pretense, no toilet brush, shower heads, tiny towels, and ambiguous mini-bar items. Interestingly, David says "It got the most comments I've ever had there. Some of them are priceless - but there are a few interesting points from the hotel industry too." Do take a read for yourself. As for us, you can expect another series of '10 things...' on a different travel topic soon.

Pictured? The divine swimming pool and courtyard at boutique hotel Tri Yaan Na Ros at Chiang Mai, Thailand. A charming hotel with delicious local Thai specialties from the market served for breakfast, but unfortunately rooms are tiny; you can read our full review here at i-escape.

We’re used to the 2pm or 3pm check-in time and noon check-out, although we’ve never been happy with them. But it appears the time you actually have in the hotel room is shrinking further. We’ve recently had 10am and 10.30am check-out times – which is fine for a roadside motel, but not so cool for a design or boutique hotel. This says to us that the hotel wants the customers there for as short a time as possible, and wants to get rid of their paying customers as soon as possible, to make the lives of their housekeepers as easy as possible. But the customer should come first, right? And what constitutes a ‘night’ in a hotel? Do we need 24 hours? Or are we just paying for a roof over our heads and a bed for whatever period the hotel deems acceptable? Here are our thoughts: if it’s a roadside motel travellers who are on the road check in late and leave early anyway, so 10am check-out is fine by us. But a business hotel or airport hotel should be as flexible as possible - and go as far as to offer 24 hour check-in to accommodate their guests who could be flying in at all sorts of unusual hours. But the luxury or resort hotel? Well, they should give guests a full 24 hours, because after all, you're there to relax, to pamper yourself, and to enjoy the hotel experience.

We asked hotel manager Guido J van den Elshout (AKA The Happy Hotelier) who owns the luxurious Haagsche Suites (pictured) to respond: "This is my take, and I'm not referring to airport hotels that have separate rules (and 100% occupancy); Yotel for instance has 4, 8 and 12-hour stays with rates accordingly. Consider the hotelier who has to organize housekeeping. Between 11am check out and 3pm check in (our practice) he has 4 hours to clean all the rooms. Usually housekeeping has an 8 hour shift. The smaller the time window between check out and check in is, the more people the hotelier needs to get the cleaning done. What does the hotelier do with those people for the other 4 hours of their shift? Probably general housekeeping or gardening, but not every housekeeper is a gardener. So hoteliers try to keep that window as wide as possible. It's not realistic to believe 4 hour shifts are possible. People need to earn a living. If you give them 4 or 5 hour shifts, they'll most likely also work for other employers. The result will most likely be those people will do a lesser job at your hotel... There's an industry rule that says cleaning a room should take between 8-15 minutes, but I can tell you that if a hotelier keeps to that your room won't be properly cleaned. As in every industry there are rules created by people who have a desk job and have never experienced housekeeping. In our property we need at least one hour per room, depending on the state the guests leave the room in. It can easily take 1.5 hours. There are occasions where we've had guests checking out at 1pm and new guests checking in between 1-3pm. Ideally you put extra housekeeping on call then, but that's hardly realistic. So you end up trying to pinpoint your peaks and hire accordingly..."

"I'd say a guest has more or less a 'right' to stay approximately 16 out of 24 hours in a hotel. My advice for the traveler? It is my experience that when you advise a hotel well in advance of your (ideal) anticipated arrival and departure times, they will try to do their utmost to accommodate your wishes. At least the smaller properties. The bigger chains have rules rules and rules and have hardly any flexibility."

So what's your take on check-in/check-out times?

Lately we’ve been checking into some gorgeous grand old piles – with varying states of upkeep. While we love those old radios that they sometimes have above the headboard, the other anonymous switches that old hotels have drive us crazy. If these butler buttons haven’t worked since 1965, it might be time to rip them out of the walls, unless a butler from 1965 turned up every time you pressed it. At least a butler from 1965 would agree with you that the button is stupid, it should be ripped out of the wall, and he’d have the contacts to make it happen on a Sunday afternoon. But don’t get us started on modern hotels that overdo the gadgetry. Those PDA-style touch screens that close the drapes, change the TV channel, adjust the air-conditioning, turn on the Jacuzzi, and could probably make you an espresso, generally turn out to be useless. I’m sure that Apple’s Steve Jobs has probably hurtled a few across a hotel suite out of sheer frustration. Here’s a tip to hoteliers thinking of implementing these systems. When it takes the guy or gal who shows you to the room fifteen minutes to explain how the interface works on the stupid thing, that’s a sign of technology making life harder rather than easier. And it’s wasting your staff’s time and making your guests aggravated.
Last month we experienced Villa Crespi (pictured) a magical old Moorish-style hotel on Italy's Lake Orta that puts the history and grandeur of the hotel first and keeps things simple for guests, so we asked Francesca Blench, Marketing Manager for Villa Crespi to respond: “Technology seems to be a godsend to many hotel guests, especially those staying in city hotels for business reasons. They are habitual travellers who need certain things and usually get them, Internet connection in particular. As an old hotel that offers hospitality to both business and leisure travellers we try to strike a happy balance between services and amenities for both types of travellers. We provide electricity at all times (!) and offer satellite TV, but that is pretty much it really, even Internet access is only available at reception. We feel that the environment needs looking after as much as our guests, so we adhere to many means of saving energy. We don’t even have key card activation for the doors and electricity. And there’s no need for our receptionists to make long explanations to guests checking in, because all they really wish for is good solid rest and a fine meal. We welcome our guests to a restful, experiential stay, far from the frustration of electromagnetic smog fears! And we always trust our guests will return a second time."
Well, we certainly intend returning, but next time it will be for a holiday rather than work.

By Terry Carter*
From our series of posts 10 things that annoy us about hotels, you might think we have a love-hate relationship with technology. We don’t. It’s just the misuse or poor implementation of technology in hotels that drives us crazy. We couldn’t do what we do without technology. Technology allows us to work from anywhere in the world and we love it! For instance, we’ve gone from researching on the road in Europe in the summer to settling down to write from quaint Eaglehawk, Australia, with a raging fire going, a good Aussie red wine breathing, cats purring, the Olympics on, and lashings of powder snow at the ski fields a tempting couple of hours away. From here we’ll be writing the European books, editing thousands of photos (20,000 from Italy alone), and sending off stories and photos to publishers around the world, all on our beloved Apple laptops. We’ll be getting paid via funds electronically transferred into our accounts and we’ll communicate with publishers and editors we work with around the planet via email and Skype. There are Wi-Fi routers, Ethernet cables and hard drives everywhere, so we’re certainly not techno-phobic. But we hate technology applied for technology’s sake, or so a hotel sales manager can add a bullet point to their power point presentation on what makes their hotel ‘cool’. Which brings me to Microsoft’s Surface tabletops being installed at a Sheraton lobby near you. Take a look at this story and its hilarious accompanying video. The best bit? There’s nothing here that couldn’t be done better on an iPhone – except annoy everyone in the lobby!

The first ‘application’ demonstrated is basically a bunch of photos of Sheraton properties you can ‘toss’ around the screen. These ‘Sheraton Snapshots’ appear impressive in that you can resize them and place them around the table. Until the Microsoft Surface Group Marketing Manager calls it a “simultaneous collaborative social experience” and the interviewer asks: “Is it just pictures or are there more details about the properties?” The sheepish reply: “Right now, it’s just pictures…”. You can’t even book a hotel from this thing, let alone see info about the properties!

The second ‘application’ is an iTunes-style music jukebox. The fact that most people sitting in a Sheraton lobby probably own an iTunes music jukebox in the form of an iPod (no, not a Microsoft Zune), appears to have escaped the great minds at Microsoft. The guy demonstrating the tool puts on Johnny Cash’s Walk The Line and the interviewer asks incredulously: “So is that playing over the general PA system in the lobby?” It turns out it isn’t - it’s coming out of the table speakers - but there are actually three of these things in the lobby. So much for the hotel foyer setting the ambiance for the property! Can you imagine the aural chaos that will ensue once a few bored teenagers start fooling with these things?

The last ‘application’ is a virtual ‘concierge’ featuring restaurants, bars and clubs in the area. Great idea, but nothing you can’t get on an iPhone that fits in your pocket. The guy demonstrates that you can zoom in on a map of your chosen restaurant and get directions to it. Great. Does it make a booking? No. Okay, but at least it enables you to transfer the restaurant directions from ‘Surface’ onto another device so you can actually use the directions to get to the restaurant? No. They can at least be printed off, right? “You can write them down,” says the Microsoft genius. Seriously. From Microsoft I was at least expecting a dot-matrix printer hidden under the table.

I’m sure there’ll be some decent applications developed for this table-sized paperweight sometime in the future, but at the moment it would be more useful if they turned it into a Microsoft Ouija Board. At least you could ask: ‘Is there a table free at this restaurant tonight?’ and enjoy a “simultaneous collaborative social experience” when it spells out ‘YES’, before you pull out your iPhone to Google Map the address…

*Terry Carter is my husband, co-author and occasional blogger for Cool Travel Guide

Often we have trouble facing the hotel breakfast buffet. After a month on the road we’re avoiding the bain-marie and its barely edible scrambled eggs and burnt-to-bits bacon. While some hotels really do take the trouble to do fresh eggs, often the cook doing the eggs is there as punishment for assorted kitchen crimes and it shows in the food. One of the problems is that the hotel is generally cooking for the expectations of foreign tourists and businesspeople-in-a-hurry, rather than locals and adventurous leisure travellers looking to try local food. Hence the generic bland scrambled eggs and burnt bacon, rather than a well-thought-out breakfast based on what's eaten locally. If you’re in Italy, why not just have an espresso and a coronet (croissant) and skip the stodge? In Germany, have some wonderful rye breads, cheese, and cold meats? In Greece? Then honey and yoghurt is the way to go. If everyone starts leaving the bain-marie alone, the hotels can put the resources to better use… and give travellers a better experience of local culture and a better start to the day.
The InterContinental Hotel Dubai Festival City does some of the best five-star hotel breakfasts we’ve ever experienced (including a delicious Arabic breakfast with piping hot flat bread made to order, as well as a range of breakfast treats from around the globe), so we asked the hotel's Executive Chef Geoff Haviland to respond: “Today’s world travelers are much more savvy and demanding than those of years past. A hotel’s breakfast experience can be a deciding factor in whether a guest returns to that hotel or not. We try to give our guests an 'In The Know' experience, which means they can sample cuisines from around the globe, and have them prepared live in front of them. Absolutely no stodgy scramblies to be found on our buffet! The concept of a live interactive buffet shows the guest we care about their needs, and want them to start their day with a WOW. The challenge in Dubai is that we have guests from every conceivable culture, so our kitchens really need to keep a close eye on our in-house guests and their tastes and preferences, to ensure our buffet features items they would find appealing.”
Unfortunately we were much too busy enjoying the InterCont’s breakfast last time we stayed to remember to take a photo! Pictured? The deliciously fresh fruit served for breakfast at Villa Rosmarino, Camogli, Italy.

If we go out to dinner one more time leaving laptops, cameras, phones, and batteries supposedly charging, only to find that the power goes off five seconds after we leave the room, we’re going to collectively scream. We don’t have a problem with the lights and the TV going off, but these days, surely just about everyone has at least a couple of devices that might need charging while they’re out. We’ve discovered recently that many ‘credit card’ style room keys even have microchips in them so that we can’t just insert any card in the slot to keep the power on (we have quite a collection of them, you see). Even getting two cards from reception and leaving one in when we go out has also failed recently because housekeeping has come in and turned down the bed anyway, removing our card on the way out – which didn’t do much for our hard drive backups that were underway! And yes, we did have the ‘Do Not Disturb’ sign on the door…
We recently stayed at the Ripa Hotel, Rome, a property boasting a contemporary design and decent amount of technology (and endearing old-fashioned extras such as champagne on ice!), that somehow still gets it right, so we asked General Manager, Arianna Roscioli, to respond: "One of the reasons guests don't have problems with doors and with the power at the Ripa is because we still use normal keys and we have a jack to turn on the power. We are not so hi-tech, yet we still provide guests with the latest technology, in-room internet access, a flat screen television, and a CD player. Personally, I think we should all try not to be so dependent on digital gadgets when travelling. I have three children from 9 to 18 and when we travel now we need a trolley just for all our cameras, laptops, ipod stations and cell phones. I guess that trying to save on utility expenses is important for any hotel in the world as well as being good for the planet, but I understand that some hotels are just a bit too much, and the rooms are more like a golden jail than a nice place to live and stay. I also don't like the electronic key system too much because it's not good for the health. I like to suggest that all travellers travel with a black tourmaline crystal to put near their laptop to neutralize the effects of electromagnetic radiation."

It shouldn’t be that hard. You have a cold tap? Make the colour on the tap blue. The hot tap? Make it red. Don’t put ‘C’ or ‘H’ on them, as for travellers from countries with Latin-derived languages, ‘C’ is not for cold but for caldo or caliente, which means HOT! Ouch! So why is it that lately we’ve felt like using every hotel bathroom is like being put through an intelligence test? We’ve been scolded, soaked, and clearly failed the exam. We've also failed to clearly grasp the logic of most contemporary bathroom designers, which seems to be to boldly design something that works in a way that defies conventional wisdom. Hotel bathroom designers seem to be going the way of toothpaste makers and razor companies, where there has to be a new gimmick to maintain interest in the product, which - no matter what they think - essentially performs a simple task. And as for the showers, baths and Jacuzzis themselves, nearly all the new designs we've sampled lately have managed to very successfully flood the bathroom - once you can get them running in the first place that is. We’re starting to put the bath towels on the floor to mop up the ensuing flood, and drying ourselves with the bath mats and hand towels. And don’t get us started with those hairdryers stuck to the walls...
As chic boutique hotel Villa Rosmarino at Camogli, Mount of Portofino, Italy, has some of the best-designed bathrooms (pictured) that we've road-tested recently (i.e. easy-to-use, spacious and light-filled with big sinks and big showers that don't flood), we asked owner-managers Fulvio Zendrini and Mario Pietraccetta to respond: "A hotel is a temporary home. It's also a travelling experience. But basically a bathroom is a place where you have to wash yourself and have other intimate experiences, which you are not going to share with everybody else! So, before thinking about candles all around your bathtub, let's have the toilet flush really work and the shower be really warm and the towels be many and clean. That's the basics. Then your hotel bathroom should be (if possible) the bathroom of your dreams: well designed, comfortable, with the right light, and the right ‘atmosphere’, the Italian marble, the hi-tech devices... the bathroom you dream of having at home. But first of all... it should be your comfortable retreat!"

By Lara & Terry*
If you've just joined us, this continues from the previous post so read this first.
So, why would these three places now get glowing reviews in an updated guidebook? What do they have in common? The answer: all of these places do excellent public relations. And when you read the reviews it’s quite easy to tell that the writer hasn't set foot in any of the places, or if the person did, they were blindfolded. A quick search on Google revealed that many of the reviews of the restaurant we left out of our edition use the same language to describe the chef, the preparation of the food, and the cuisine itself. It’s not a coincidence. It’s simply a recycled press release. And to the writer in a hurry on a tight budget, the 'general consensus' is enough to tick it off for inclusion and write the review from the establishment’s website, a press release, or other lustrous reviews.

In this particular city, we had tried all the restaurants we put in the first edition of that book, as we’d been regular visitors to the city for years. And on subsequent visits we used our local industry contacts (hotel staff, chefs and so on) to identify new places to try. But what we found most interesting from our guidebook test were the other reviewers’ responses to the restaurants we didn’t think were very good. When we discussed this with our informed local contacts in the restaurant or hotel business they almost unanimously said: “I can never understand why foreign writers think that place is so good!” One famous chef we recently interviewed knows exactly what we’re talking about. He told us that one dish that was on his menu for only a couple of months a few years ago keeps appearing in 'reviews' of his restaurant in travel guidebooks and articles. He blames one high-profile magazine article (which has since appeared on the internet) for this and is bemused by diners coming in and asking for the dish! The mention of this dish is his benchmark for judging whether the writer has even looked at his menu.

And this is why buying a guidebook is such a lottery. If you’ve been to a city before and you’re looking to buy a guidebook on it for another trip, look for a review of a hotel or restaurant you know. Is it in there? Good. Does the review make it sound remotely like the place you know? Yes? Excellent. If it doesn’t list it or it describes it in a way that’s not like the place you know, leave the book on the shelf.

Just as an aside, we were relieved to find that our names aren’t mentioned at all in the current incarnation of that first book we originally authored. It’s somewhat petty of the publishers, seeing our content was original, but considering the state of the current edition, we’re actually grateful!

Pictured? One hotel in Northern Italy that in no uncertain terms lives up to its eco-friendly credentials, Vigilius Mountain Resort. This is a photo of our room. We actually stayed there. Do you trust us?

By Terry* and Lara
Sometimes when you visit a restaurant or stay at a hotel recommended by a guidebook, and it’s either nothing like you expected or you’re wondering what the fuss is about, don’t worry, the problem probably doesn’t lie with you. It’s quite likely the fault of a lazy reviewer. When we recently revisited an Italian city we’ve written extensively about, we dropped into a couple of bookshops to thumb through the latest guides to see what insightful new content had been created on the city. Our little test is to look for reviews of places we know intimately and see whether the writers know their stuff and/or whether we are simpatico with their thinking.

In this particular city (which shall remain nameless), we know one hotel extremely well, having had several lengthy stays there while researching the city. So we know about this certain hotel’s marketing gimmick and claims to being an “eco-friendly” hotel, which have little foundation. We mentioned this in our review of the property for a book on the city several years ago. Indeed, we wrote the review from our room there! But in an updated edition of that book, the new review by another author essentially reflects the hotel’s press release rather than the reality - that would have been revealed by a quick inspection and a couple of well-chosen questions. In the same guidebook, flicking through to the eating section, we noticed that a couple of well-known restaurants we were told we “had to” include in the book now get glowing reviews. One, we’d been able to convince the editor to leave out of our edition, as our meals had been ordinary and stupidly expensive. The other, we gave an average review; we had to include it because it had such a high profile. On both counts, we argued our case strongly. By doing so we felt we were doing the right thing by the readers.

This is how we approach our reviewing. If our readers are going to a destination and only have a couple of days to spend there, we obviously want them to have the best experience possible. If we’re going to send them to a so-called “eco-friendly” hotel that isn’t very eco-friendly at all, we’ll tell them why: because it’s a clean, decent-value hotel in an expensive city, despite its disingenuous eco-claims. If we think a restaurant doesn’t warrant inclusion, we’ll leave it out. And if we think another restaurant is very average but has to be included because of its high-profile chef and famous investors, we’ll reluctantly put it in, write a critical review, and leave it up to the reader to decide whether they want to spend their hard-earned cash there or go to another restaurant we wholeheartedly recommend instead. When writing reviews and labouring over these issues, we always ask ourselves: would we recommend the place to our friends? And would we be happy to go there with them?

The photo? It's the funky lobby of Qamardeen Hotel again, in Dubai. And no, they're not paying us, we just love this property and think it's one of Dubai's most stylish, best value, and yet, bafflingly, most underrated hotels.

* Terry is my co-author and husband, who occasionally blogs for Cool Travel Guide.

Don’t get us wrong, we love Wi-Fi. We use it often. We’d use it more often except that hotels that promise Wi-Fi in every room are generally telling a little white (Wi-Fi) lie. And hotels that promise 'free' Wi-Fi that actually ends up being free are few and far between. It usually turns out that there’s only a signal in room 666 and in the foyer. Except to access the 'free' Wi-Fi in the foyer you have to log on and pay with your credit card. We've lost count of the number of times we’ve wandered hotel hallways looking for a signal. And that's even after we've double-checked that the hotel has Wi-Fi before booking the room and emailed the property to make sure we get a room with a wireless signal. Just last week, for example, we stayed in two five-star luxury hotels with Wi-Fi problems. In one of the hotels, the Wi-Fi router in our room was covered in dust and had never been connected to power. Ever. In the other, we had to stand in our hotel room doorway just to get enough signal to send emails. And these are hotels charging around €500 a night (not that we were paying that figure of course) and then have the hide to charge extra for Wi-FI – another annoyance. Give us good broadband access via cable and we’ll plug in our own Airport Express, thanks. At least we know it works!
A general manager of a large multinational five-star luxury hotel responds: "Wi-Fi is the bane of our existence. At our hotel, we have an outside company that handles it but we just can’t get them to provide a service that consistently works. It’s mind-boggling. We have to try and get out of our contract with them to get it fixed. It’s a nightmare. And we know our guests are not happy, but our hands are tied."
While we sympathise, if the Wi-Fi's not working properly then guests shouldn't be charged for it. Frankly, though, it should be free anyway. We don't know about you, but to us, it's the most essential thing in the room, more crucial than a television or telephone. What do you think?

You know the ones, those fixed coat hangers that don’t come off the rail in the cupboard. We always like to hang a few items of clothing when we get to our room and those stupid hangers are so annoying. We also like to take the hung clothes out of the cupboard and into the bathroom for a quick steam while we have a shower – it helps get out the little wrinkles. Those coat hangers really spoil our evening. Order an iron and ironing board, you say? We don’t want to go to that much trouble if we can avoid it and in some countries (hello, Italy!), they won’t send one to your room as it’s against fire safety laws. And if we’re only staying one night, there’s no chance we’re going to send anything out to be pressed as we may never see it again. Who steals those things anyway? And, let’s say someone does steal one once in a blue moon, why do we have pay for it by being treated like a potential thief?
A general manager of a large multinational hotel responds: “We don’t use fixed coat hangers in our hotel, but we do ‘lose’ several hundred of our good wooden hangers each month. We don’t want to use the fixed hangers as we appreciate they’re an inconvenience to guests. And a little tacky. But it’s strange to think that several times a day people are checking out of the hotel with our coat hangers in their bags! But that’s the price we’re willing to pay to keep our guests happy.”
The hotel may be happy to pay the price, but we're not. Does this drive anyone else nuts, or is it just us?

Sure we could just ask for an ice bucket for that nice bottle of crisp white or bubbly we bought at the airport duty free. But we want to put it in the mini bar in the room that we’ve paid for. And that's not always as easy as it should be. Those sensors that automatically charge to your account anything that you move in the mini bar are a little too ‘big brother’ for us. Just what are people doing to the mini bar contents that has made this so necessary? And they're even doing it in five-star luxury properties? They sure are.
A general manager of a large multinational hotel responds: “Scotch bottles filled with tea, vodka replaced with water, beer cans opened every-so-slightly, emptied, then put back in the fridge... The list is endless! And we just don’t have time to take out every item in every mini bar everyday to check if it’s still intact. But at our hotel we still don’t use the sensor system - despite it obviously being more efficient - because it treats the guests like criminals. However, when we do refurbish the rooms it will be hard not to consider installing them because we lose a lot of money each day through people tampering with the contents of the fridge.”
Well, you know who you are. Will you please just give it up.
So, what annoys you about hotels?